A Letter to My Grandmother

Dear Granny,

I miss you on Sundays, because that’s when we’d to do our face masks. While there’s nothing quite as startling as your grandmother in a dried avocado mask looking down at you from their phone, I’m scrolling through the pictures now regretting the Sundays that I skipped, laughing at all the variations of grandmother selfies, and thinking about how I never want to do a face mask again without you.

See Granny, the thing is: you never think you’ll lose your grandparents — or at least I never thought I’d lose you. Even though you’d lived a whole life before I even came into the picture, somehow I thought you’d just continue to exist. You do in my heart and memory but…

I want to call you and ask you how to deal with losing you — you’d undoubtedly have some anecdotal advice for me as you always did — but I can’t and that hurts the most.

You were one of my best friends, my role model, my mentor, and my grandmother all in one. You imparted upon me so much wisdom and love in the 24 years that we were blessed with and I’m forever grateful for that time. I’ve realized that so much that I do and so many of the decisions I make are guided by words of wisdom from you. I promise to think of you everyday — you’ve left a Granny-sized whole in my heart.

I’ll think of you when I wear leggings with the mesh cut-outs, because you prayed for me to be delivered from my less than modest fashion choices 😂

I’ll stay put in the Chick-Fil-A line even when it’s too long, because that’s the Lord’s chicken and the site of many granny/granddaughter lunch dates.

I’ll hear your voice telling me to treat and celebrate myself whenever I accomplish, even if it’s with something as small as a pen or a handkerchief.

I’ll practice presence, power, and peace — Granny’s 3 P’s as you called them — whenever I’m anxious about the outcome.

I’ll preach Jesus and only use words when I have to because that’s how you lived a life that so many can admire.

I’ll pray for those who knew you and those who loved you (one in the same because to know you was to adore you).

I’ll think of you everyday, but I won’t stay sad for long because I know you wouldn’t like that.

I miss you Granny.

Love,

Your granddaughter and biggest fan